Wednesday, February 9, 2011

conscious stream

her excitement burbles and stutters
the same words crashing
incessantly incessantly
against the unreasonable boulder

trying to say it all
to say everything at once
pitch rising and rising
like vocal water vapor
consonants jumping from the stream
little silver fish glinting

can't recall what she was saying
but the way she said it
stubborn waves breaking free
rushing out
the rubbled boulder beaten
her blue eyes a waterfall

written for one shot wednesday


  1. these words make me see her...the blue eyes a waterfall..your poem bubbles with energy..i like it

  2. oh i am right there...trying to get it out before it is too late...through the tears...

  3. Oh, it's gorgeous, the first stanza is glorious.

  4. "can't recall what she was saying
    but the way she said it" sometimes it is what is the spaces between the words that reveal the truth of a story.

  5. Wow, Lizziviggi, this is so vivid and imaginative... I liked it a lot... I could see it all there in the last lines...
    ॐ नमः शिवाय
    Om Namah Shivaya

  6. sometimes you just got to get it out...
    "the rubbled boulder beaten"...excellent

    oh yea, I like pringles

    Peace, hp

    thank you for stopping by

  7. I love the images here. I'm going to be a constant reader of yours.

  8. elegant imagery..

    Please feel free to share 1 to 3 poems with our potluck poetry today, first time participants could use old poems or poems unrelated to our theme, Thanks..
    Happy Monday!